Would you like to hear a funny story? Of course you would. This is the story of what I consider my "most embarrassing moment," even though enough time has passed that I'm no longer embarrassed (hence my public re-telling). It now is simply one of the funniest stories of my life. Could be that it's a "had to be there" situation, but regardless, you'll probably at least appreciate the embarrassment factor.
I happened to think of this story during a lovely dinner with my friend Nicole. We used to go to college together and even were R.A.s together for two years (along with Bestie, Ashley, and Ilene... hi guys! :) ). We were reminiscing about how much we loved college, and this story came to mind. So, for your reading pleasure, I give you "Amanda's Most Embarrassing Moment:"
We were up in Wisconsin, maybe? It was R.A. retreat, about a week or so before the rest of the students arrived on campus. We R.A.s traveled up to a cute little camp on a lake and bonded, as well as prepared for the rigors of R.A.-hood when we returned to Chicago. R.A. retreat was always a blast. My particularly favorite activity was when 2nd year R.A.s pretended to break all sorts of rules and the 1st years had to confront them on it. Awesome. Well, the girls in my small group decided we'd go out on the "banana boat"-- a big inflatable monstrosity that was pulled behind a speed boat. It was the shape of a banana, with handles along the middle only, fitting maybe five in a line. The driver of this boat was notorious for getting out into the middle of the lake, and when everyone was comfortably speeding along behind him, he would yell "SWITCH!" and while the boat is still flying over the water, the passengers on the banana boat had to maneuver themselves into another position. Keep in mind, it was a banana shape. There was no room on the sides. I'm guessing most people just did a back flip over everyone and landed perfectly in another spot, because otherwise, HOW THE HECK DID PEOPLE DO THAT?! I got on this banana boat with one stipulation: I would NOT be switching when he yelled me to do so. I simply wouldn't. I didn't care if he stopped the boat. I didn't care if I was seen as a spoilsport. I would NOT be switching. Why? Because if I switched, I'd land promptly in the water and wouldn't be able to get back on the banana boat. I just knew it.
So we donned our life jackets and off we sped. I love boats, so it was quite invigorating and fun... until the driver yelled "SWITCH!"
"No. I'm not doing it," I yelled over the roar of the motor and the spray of the lake.
"Come on! Do it!" my girlfriends yelled as they were already switching, somehow miraculously NOT falling into the water.
Then suddenly, I was switching. I grabbed onto the one handle in front of my and attempted to do who knows what-- I just needed to get to another spot and FAST.
But then it happened. I slipped, and fell into the water. Only I didn't let go of the handle. So there I was, hanging onto the handle of the banana boat, going full speed around the lake, my body slapping against the water again and again like a rag doll. Of course the water was going against my body, which gave me the most lovely water wedgie as it shoved my bathing suit up my booty. I offered a full moon to anyone who was watching... including but not limited to the MALE R.A. in the boat.
This kept up for quite some time, or at least it felt that way, until one of my friends on the banana boat got the driver to stop the boat. At that point, laughing hysterically, my friends attempted to pull me by my life jacket back onto the banana. What happens when you are laughing hysterically? You have no strength. Imagine just how successful the pulling was, what with the silent laughter and all. Finally they pulled me up, I picked my wedgie, and we made our way back.
I think I didn't stop laughing about this incident for a good two weeks. I was mortified, but I was able to make a lot of people laugh, so it was worth it, right? Right?!
xoxo,
A
Showing posts with label college. Show all posts
Showing posts with label college. Show all posts
1.08.2013
11.07.2012
How I Voted Twice but Never Really Voted at All:
This was my third election that I've had the privelege to participate in. I am 28, so the first election I voted in was Bush v. Kerry. You know, the infamous "hanging chad" election. Except I wasn't in Florida at the time-- I was living in the dorms at Moody as a junior. (Edit: Bestie Jr.'s husband reminded me that was the election BEFORE Bush v. Kerry. Oops. They all run together, apparently.)
I had an absentee ballot from my hometown of Midlothian, Illinois. I was voting for Bush (not that it mattered in Illinois anyway), and super excited to vote for the first time. I filled out everything on my ballot, put it in the "privacy sleeve" (what a joke) and envelope, signed and dated it, and put it in my bag to mail.
*****
In my whole life, I've only really had two things stolen from me: once, I left my small white purse in the band room in high school. My Christian high school. It was gone and I lost my favorite lip gloss and eye shadow. Waaaaah. And then I had my bag stolen from outside the SDR (student dining room) at Moody. The day I had my ballot inside.
Yeah... it just so happens that that was the beginning of a string of thefts at Moody, all from kids that Moody students would bring in from Cabrini Green (read: ghetto). The video surveillance showed a little kid stealing my bag from among dozens. Maybe she liked the pattern? Who knows.
All I know is I lost my dog-eared and marked-up copy of Jane Eyre, my class notes, my new cell phone (my first cell phone), my R.A. binder (later returned by a man who called himself "Prince Ali Ababua."),.... and my ballot.
I didn't really know what to do about that. I was pretty sure this theif wasn't going to mail my ballot for me. So on election day, I went down to the local voting location and voted in person.
Later I found out it didn't count. :(
Good thing it all turned out in the end... but man, what a bummer on your first election! Since then, I vote by mail and turn it in just a couple days before the actual election. Way less stressful, and I don't even have to pay for stamps.
And we all know we have to guard our stamp money, what with the economy taking a nosedive and all.... ;)
xoxo, A
I had an absentee ballot from my hometown of Midlothian, Illinois. I was voting for Bush (not that it mattered in Illinois anyway), and super excited to vote for the first time. I filled out everything on my ballot, put it in the "privacy sleeve" (what a joke) and envelope, signed and dated it, and put it in my bag to mail.
*****
In my whole life, I've only really had two things stolen from me: once, I left my small white purse in the band room in high school. My Christian high school. It was gone and I lost my favorite lip gloss and eye shadow. Waaaaah. And then I had my bag stolen from outside the SDR (student dining room) at Moody. The day I had my ballot inside.
Yeah... it just so happens that that was the beginning of a string of thefts at Moody, all from kids that Moody students would bring in from Cabrini Green (read: ghetto). The video surveillance showed a little kid stealing my bag from among dozens. Maybe she liked the pattern? Who knows.
All I know is I lost my dog-eared and marked-up copy of Jane Eyre, my class notes, my new cell phone (my first cell phone), my R.A. binder (later returned by a man who called himself "Prince Ali Ababua."),.... and my ballot.
I didn't really know what to do about that. I was pretty sure this theif wasn't going to mail my ballot for me. So on election day, I went down to the local voting location and voted in person.
Later I found out it didn't count. :(
Good thing it all turned out in the end... but man, what a bummer on your first election! Since then, I vote by mail and turn it in just a couple days before the actual election. Way less stressful, and I don't even have to pay for stamps.
And we all know we have to guard our stamp money, what with the economy taking a nosedive and all.... ;)
xoxo, A
11.03.2012
Dumb yet Awesome Stuff I Did in College
A couple weeks ago, Hband and I were in the car, and he said this: "Correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm not as fun as I used to be."
Now, I think Hband is still a really fun guy. I mean, he uses a silly voice for our dog, and that's pretty fun. Even if he denies that he does it. He does it. Are you reading this, Hband? I'm calling you out. Regardless, I responded, "You're not less fun; you're just growing up."
I've already realized I'm less fun than when I was in college. Don't forget, I'm a whopping 4 years older than Hband. Four years, one month, and three days. He's now beginning to comprehend that post-college means post-fun. Not really, but kind of.
Last week, Bestie Jr. and I were driving home from a sister date, on which we saw Pitch Perfect (yes, it was very good!). On the way home, we cackled about all the dumb yet somehow awesome stuff we did in college. It was all so fun. Then I spilled my water all over myself as I was driving and we laughed until we were silent. You know why? Because even post-college, we're still fun. :)
The dumb yet awesome stuff we did in college includes but is not limited to this list:
1. Rolling our upper lip over our teeth and slumping against the wall in the hall of our floor, pretending we died that way, with our eyes open. We wanted to see how long it would take for people to notice/laugh/prod us. Only one person even acknowledged us. But we loved it.
2. Sledding down a tiny hill next to train tracks in downtown Chicago... on garbage bags.
3. Pretending to get beaten up by Bestie while we were roommates, just to see who would come by, alarmed. No one ever did. They knew better.
4. Knocking over a red candle that was sitting on a candle warmer... and having your room look like a murder scene. Then posing like dead bodies for pictures.
5. Pretending to be conjoined twins by sharing a shirt and tying our legs together.
6. Creating an a cappella bluegrass band that played the air fiddle, air banjo, and the "vocalizer." We specialized in singing "Happy Birthday" to students, sometimes in the dining room (SDR).
7. Having an all-day Bro-Sis outing, during which we visited four museums, I think, and then when to Chinatown. I also left my video camera in the Planetarium and had an athsma attack, all on the same day.
8. Dragging Bestie down the hall on a blanket in the middle of the night.
9. Creating valentines for our brother floor that went something like this:
Majestic
Illustrious
Kid-friendly
Ever-present.
10. Having a bro-sis overnight at Inner-City Impact, where we made a horror movie in the middle of the night.
11. Walking to Jewel in the hood at 10 p.m. in the cold, just to get break-and-bakes to aide our studying.
That's not the half of it, and pretty tame compared to others. But for me, those were dumb, awesome, fun days. But today is pretty fun too-- just maybe less dumb. :)
xoxo, A
Now, I think Hband is still a really fun guy. I mean, he uses a silly voice for our dog, and that's pretty fun. Even if he denies that he does it. He does it. Are you reading this, Hband? I'm calling you out. Regardless, I responded, "You're not less fun; you're just growing up."
I've already realized I'm less fun than when I was in college. Don't forget, I'm a whopping 4 years older than Hband. Four years, one month, and three days. He's now beginning to comprehend that post-college means post-fun. Not really, but kind of.
Last week, Bestie Jr. and I were driving home from a sister date, on which we saw Pitch Perfect (yes, it was very good!). On the way home, we cackled about all the dumb yet somehow awesome stuff we did in college. It was all so fun. Then I spilled my water all over myself as I was driving and we laughed until we were silent. You know why? Because even post-college, we're still fun. :)
The dumb yet awesome stuff we did in college includes but is not limited to this list:
1. Rolling our upper lip over our teeth and slumping against the wall in the hall of our floor, pretending we died that way, with our eyes open. We wanted to see how long it would take for people to notice/laugh/prod us. Only one person even acknowledged us. But we loved it.
2. Sledding down a tiny hill next to train tracks in downtown Chicago... on garbage bags.
3. Pretending to get beaten up by Bestie while we were roommates, just to see who would come by, alarmed. No one ever did. They knew better.
4. Knocking over a red candle that was sitting on a candle warmer... and having your room look like a murder scene. Then posing like dead bodies for pictures.
5. Pretending to be conjoined twins by sharing a shirt and tying our legs together.
6. Creating an a cappella bluegrass band that played the air fiddle, air banjo, and the "vocalizer." We specialized in singing "Happy Birthday" to students, sometimes in the dining room (SDR).
7. Having an all-day Bro-Sis outing, during which we visited four museums, I think, and then when to Chinatown. I also left my video camera in the Planetarium and had an athsma attack, all on the same day.
8. Dragging Bestie down the hall on a blanket in the middle of the night.
9. Creating valentines for our brother floor that went something like this:
Majestic
Illustrious
Kid-friendly
Ever-present.
10. Having a bro-sis overnight at Inner-City Impact, where we made a horror movie in the middle of the night.
11. Walking to Jewel in the hood at 10 p.m. in the cold, just to get break-and-bakes to aide our studying.
That's not the half of it, and pretty tame compared to others. But for me, those were dumb, awesome, fun days. But today is pretty fun too-- just maybe less dumb. :)
xoxo, A
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)