It's a Girl!
After waiting for what seemed like forever but was actually 15 weeks, we finally got to find out the gender of our little one.
I don't know if there has ever been a time where I've waited with as much anticipation. It was different from moving or getting married, because there was nothing I could do about it. I've heard it said that finding out the gender of your child is one of the few true surprises in your life, and I can say with certainty that it's true. It didn't matter what old wives' tale I heard-- there was no way for us to know until that ultrasound.
As I drove to my appointment, I thought about what I would want to teach my child, depending on its gender. If it would be a boy, I'd want to teach him to respect women, keep his eyes, mind, and body pure, and to be a diligent worker. If it would be a girl, I'd want to teach her to be comfortable with her body, have a strong, witty mind, and respect herself.
I felt such nervous anticipation! Honestly, Mike and I thought it might be a boy. I don't have any reason for that, and not even that motherly hunch some get. We just thought it might be. And truthfully, we hoped for that, because we want to make sure the Arbia name carries on. We were excited and prepared for either, however, knowing that the child we have is the precise child God has picked out for us.
We saw her cute little profile, and it kind of took my breath away. The last time I saw her, she was a tiny little gummy bear with wiggling legs. Now-- now she really looked like a little person. The technician called her strong and scrappy. She showed us her working heart, strong spine, and how she'd grab her feet with ten little toes. We thought she'd never tell us. Until she did.
I grabbed Mike's hand and my eyes started to tear up. I didn't make a sound, but somehow the technician knew. She passed me a tissue. I couldn't help but get misty eyed: we could finally call our baby "she," which is infinitely more real than "it." And she is ours.
I'm halfway through the pregnancy now. It's nice to have direction, not just for planning purposes, but for dreaming purposes. Dreaming of this little girl and who she'll be, what she'll look like, what I'll teach her... now it feels real.
I'm sorry for the post entirely about the baby, but wow... I just had to share today's emotions.